Hexagram 13 (Tong Ren): Fellowship with Men and How to Find True Friends

The Story of Hexagram 13: Fire Burning Under the Open Sky

In the I Ching, Hexagram 13 is made of Heaven (the wide open sky) above Fire. When a fire burns openly on a grassy plain, its light spreads in all directions. Everyone is invited to warm their hands—nobody is left out in the cold.

The book says: "Fellowship with men in the open: Success. It furthers one to cross the great water." This means when you are honest, fair, and treat people with respect, you can accomplish huge goals that you could never do all by yourself.

Hexagram 13 in Love and Dating

In love, Hexagram 13 means you and your partner need to be best friends first! A relationship built only on physical attraction can get rocky, but a relationship where you genuinely like each other, share goals, and laugh together will survive anything.

If you and your partner have been arguing, look at the big picture. Remember that you are both on the same team. You are fighting the problem, not fighting each other.

Hexagram 13 vs Hexagram 38: The Two Paths

In the book, Hexagram 13 is the opposite of Hexagram 38 (Opposition). While Hexagram 38 is about two people looking in opposite directions and picking fights over small things, Hexagram 13 is about finding common ground. Look for what you have in common instead of focusing on what makes you different.